What to do when your child has cut their own hair is a topic most parents cringe to consider for several reasons. There’s the loss of all those baby curls, the feeling of helplessness in that you can’t go back and undo what has been done, and then there is the hard issue of how to handle the situation in a way that conveys to your child that it isn’t good behavior to hack off their hair when no one’s looking.
A few years back, Courtney Bloomfield, owner of Shady Grove Flower Shop, located on Lexington Ave, was faced with this scenario:
First off, how long have you been the owner of Shady Grove?
I have owned Shady Grove for 11 years now (it's easy to keep track as it is as old as my first born child!)
Courtney is the proud mother of three. She has a son, Desmond (11), and two daughters, Zaida (7) and Naomi (3). Some years ago her first daughter, Zaida, hacked off her hair, causing Courtney to have to come into Adorn in order to get it fixed.
What was the story behind Zaida's haircut? Where were you and how did you find out that she had cut her own hair?
Well, I was at work (busy time of year). It was Spring (May) and she was a few months into being a "terrific" two year old. A friend was babysitting her and she called to tell me that something bad had happened (I freaked out!!!). Then she said what it was, and I totally relaxed. Until a minute later when I remembered that Zaida was to be the star of the show as a flower girl in my sister's wedding the following week. So, needless to say, I went back to the freak-out phase knowing this would just devastate the bride and MOB! I asked her how bad and she said pretty short. All the while I am recalling the horrible haircut I gave myself in my preschool. A whole other story, however it ends with a truly terrible haircut right at my forehead hairline. Pretty typical, I'm sure. Zaida, on the other hand, had cut hers in the back, mostly around the crown of her head. So we came into Adorn, and seriously, she got the cutest little pixie haircut ever!!! In fact, it is probably the haircut I would love to give myself if I ever thought it might even work with my hair (which it wouldn't). Cute and short in the back, slight little angled-effect to keeping some of the length in the front, with cute little pixie-esque wispy-ness! Turns out Zaida knew just what would be adorable (she does have quite the sense of style!). As it turns out, she was a cute little flower girl who didn't "ruin the wedding pictures" and even added the enhanced comic relief that the flower girls usually bring to wedding ceremonies. I did, however, have a little sadness of her first haircut happening so abruptly as they are sometimes a little bit of an "emotional" thing. Also, I must say I was a little attached to her beautiful long silky soft and wavy baby hair (which is never the same again!)
What was the main thing you had to remind yourself to not do?
Mostly, to just not be mad at the babysitter!
What your advice be to other parents going through this experience?
Go to a professional hair stylist and have them analyze your situation before making any drastic moves. It could turn out great. (I do realize though that this is not always the case. Mine, as a child, was a total disaster. Or perhaps my mom just didn't know the right stylist).
5. Did you or Zaida learn anything particularly important from the experience?
Well, to just roll with it, to not let family get you upset over stuff that matters more to them and less to you, to enjoy baby hair while you can and to try to not get attached, to remind babysitters that you can't take your eyes off toddlers, to always trust Zaida's opinion when it comes to stylistic matters. Zaida - probably learned that when Mama's away, scissors are easier to get a hold of and perhaps mischief is more easily achieved. She probably also learned what it was like to have short hair. And to be honest, to this day, she prefers it on the shorter side. Although I don't know if a 2 year old really knows the ramifications of what they are doing when they cut their hair. I think they get a hold of some scissors and hair is just a logical easy thing in arm's reach to grab hold of and start cutting! And thank goodness it doesn't cause (hopefully) any real damage.
What to do when your child has decided to be their own stylist:
- Don’t panic - hair grows back fast
- Remember that children learn everything by mimicking what they see. It may be a good idea to explain beforehand the rules of scissors, but it’s also a good idea to remember that this happens to almost every child at one point or another - it’s an expression of learning and exploring. The most important thing is to make sure you don’t shame your child away from that, but guide them to do it in a way that is easier on you both. A good example of this is allowing them some freedom in deciding their haircut when going to the stylist. You can make it an activity and let them cut out pictures of haircuts they like from magazines to make a collage to bring to their stylist (Hint: this helps the stylist too!).
Something to remember that help you, your child, and your stylist out when bringing your child in to have their hair cut:
- Bring something for your child to do while they sit in the chair. Sitting still for an hour is extremely difficult for most adults, but almost impossible for children. Bring a coloring book, or a comic book, a hand held game, or something that they can do that keep their head somewhat still. Adorn has a few coloring books and childrens books handy, but for most salons it’s not a guarantee that these items will be available.
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